At A Moments Notice...

"We don't help each other enough." Is what I thought moments before I picked up the phone and began dialing the number. "We don't give back."

I have been angry. But not just angry, pissed. Because it seems my brothers, my sisters are once again railing against each other. The world is in chaos. Wars upon wars. Hate crimes fuckin' galore. And still the same old rhetoric is being heard day in and day out: I'm right, he's wrong.

What if we're all wrong? What if all of this is a big ass joke? What if your life, the one you value far above and beyond your neighbor's is just that, a big ass joke? What if you had to care? Had to love? Had to concern yourself with the problems and/or plights of someone other than your own? What if you actually gave a damn? Could you possibly live your best life then?

Tell me, honestly, what do you think? Do you think then maybe we could change the world? Do you think maybe we can do something about the shit going on in Haiti? Do you think maybe someone would give a damn about a young man nearly beaten to death all because his father loathes the person he loves?

I'm tellin' you we don't help each other enough. We don't fuckin' care.

A few weeks ago Prime confessed: My Spirit Can Only Take So Much Abuse. A fitting title for a fitting dilemma. It hurts when your people do not understand you. It hurts when they curse your name. It hurts when they turn their back on you. One of my aunts did this to me at my parent’s 50th anniversary celebration. She looked at me, paused, then turned away. I knew before I went down there that she had heard the news. She had heard that I was gay, and had written a book on the subject. And even though she probably had no reason to do so before she quickly discovered grounds to hate me. So much so, she was able to look at me, and simply walk away. Ouch.

I have walked the path of truth. I know that her actions revealed less about me, and so much more about her. I know that her heart, though she feels is filled with the righteousness of God, is quite truthfully filled with the cantankerous passion fueled by fear, the primary disciple of evil. And though I know one day she will regret wholeheartedly what she did--it will never ease the pain I felt as I watched her, flesh of my flesh, blood of my blood, turn her back on me.

Forget about her, they’ve advised me. Just, forget about her.

But I say: If only I could. You see because she is the reason so many of my brothers and sisters hide the light that they are! She is the reason so many of us choose death over life; darkness over light; fear over truth! She is the reason so many hate the wonder God himself created. My aunt and a million others like her is the sole reason this world is so very fucked up!

And so yes, I am angry. But I’m sure you know it's not difficult to be angry nowadays. You need no rhyme or reason. All you need is but to open your eyes, and see first hand what we have created. What we have allowed to go on. Many will tell you to stay clear of anger, and to be certain not to entertain it. But what they are really saying is to stay clear of the truth! Because I guarantee you no man can truly be happy as long as he knows another sits not too far off in the distance suffering! No man with a pulse steadily thumping in his body could be that cold.

For years the question has been raised: Am I My Brother's Keeper? And for years the answer has been yes. But I wonder…when does the keeping begin? When does the love begin? When does the understanding begin? When? Can somebody tell me when?

And so I made the phone call and I spoke to the brother. Because the revolution begins with one. I spoke to him because when I first reached out to my brothers--other established authors, some successful, some hopeful, some struggling to provide us justice--most, try 98% never bothered to reach back [Christopher who?]. I spoke to him because I had to speak to him. I spoke to him because I am overjoyed every-fucking-time I hear a young man or woman say: I wanna write! I spoke to him because I am my brother's keeper, and unlike so many who claim to do so, I really do give a damn.

One day I hope you do too.